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Pregnant Puzzle





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T H E H O M E R V A R G A S S T O R Y A R C H I V E

All stories in this archive are the property of the author.

They may be downloaded and read by private citizens. They

are not to be used by commercial web sites. Persons using

this material on commercial sites will be vigorously pur-

sued by the "hounds from hell," or my legal team, whichever

is deemed necessary. These stories were written for adult

entertainment and should not be accessed by children.

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Pregnant Puzzle (M/F, preg, humor)

Homer Vargas

Vargas111@yahoo.com

Prolific polished prose porn pushers portraying

pronounced procreation-plotting penchants regularly

receive readers' requests regarding recommendations.

Dear Dr. Vargas,

My superheroine girlfriend is pregnant for the first

time. [Amazing photo attached to original letter; too

bad you all can't see it.] It wasn't easy to nail

her, I'll tell you. I finally had to use

[superheroine secret weakness, which cannot be

revealed without disclosing her identity]. From then

on, she was a real sex kitten, just couldn't get

enough. At first, she begged me not to get her

pregnant, but when I made it clear that was the only

way she could keep getting fucked, there was nothing

she could do but count the days util her missed

period. For the last month or so she has been getting

all the usual cravings (pickles by the barrel and

pistachio-prune ice cream by the gallon) and is

happily knitting little pink booties -- TWO SETS!

Last week all her superheroine girlfriends and even a

few vilainesses got together for a baby shower. I was

surprised how many had already started families or

were WELL on the way. Apparently my girlfriend was

one of the last of these virginal beauties to succumb.

The rest were exchanging ribald stories about how to

use their superpowers or criminal schemes to get laid,

comparing tummies, and teasing the few holdouts about

what they were missing.

I'm overjoyed, of course, seeing this magnificent

woman waddle around the house with that big smooth

tummy filled to bursting, her tits ballooned up to

38EEE's at least, and a dumb, adoring expression on

her face when she looks at me. As expected, the

pregnancy has made her nicely docile and even hornier.

She has me doing her doggie style most of the time,

"practicing" for when she REALLY gets big. I've

bought her a heavy-duty vibrator to use in between

times. When she gets it going, it draws more power

than the A/C on a hot August day and blows the fuses

right and left, but that's better than her going crazy

or fucking me to death.

The only problem is, she is asking how soon after she

gives birth she can go back to fighting crime? Dr

Luthor, her OB-GYN, just smirks evilly and tells her

to ask me.

John Perplexed

Dear John,

First, congratulation for nailing one of those

superheroines. I don't think those bitches realize

how much frustration they cause fourteen-year old boys
of all ages, flying around in those skimpy outfits,

fighting, and getting tied up and chloroformed.

Millions of "fans" will thank you for taking another

one out of circulation in the best possible way: a

timely delivery of male semen into her super-fertile

twat!

Second, I'm so glad you posed this question. It's one

that I've been getting more and more frequently in

recent years as a number of superheroines (and

villainesses) from the early comic book days are

starting to hear the tick tock of the old biological

clock. I'm not detracting from your cleverness in

knocking up your new gf, but her body was obviously

telling her it was time to slow down and become a

Mommy.

Normally it's easier for villainesses to combine a

career in crime with rearing a family, as they have

henchwenches to carry out their evil schemes.

(Apparently, though you just can't GOOD help nowadays,

you can still get EVIL help.) I know of one whose

name, very appropriately, rhymes with "Fatwoman," who

seduced and moved in with an erstwhile hero whom she

keeps busy eating and feeding her hungry puss. Now

she lives in semi retirement, popping out one or two

pointy eared babies every year for her devotedly

overworked love-slave to take care of while she

manages her crime empire from his cave beneath the

stately Wayne Mansion. Superheroines, on the other

hand, have to do all the crime fighting, plot

thwarting, fiendish conspiracy foiling, and world

saving, themselves.

Another consideration is how long it will take her to

regain her figure. You girlfriend seems typical of

superheroines who, having remained impossibly slim for

years, take advantage of 'eating for two' really to

pig out. (Pistachio-prune ice cream? Dios Mio!) If

you can get her to put on 50-60 pounds, that would

take quite a while to work off, especially if you

insist she stay in bed, eat well, drink beer and wine

"for her milk" and get lots of sleep while nursing her

liter. Eating a tipsy superheroine to several nice

orgasms before finishing her off with a pussy full of

cum, will help keep her snoozing away happily.

Further, you need to bear in mind just WHAT is growing

in there. Although villainesses tend to have "happy

accidents" with hunky henchmen or occasionally with a

lucky superhero and therefore to have human or

humanoid babies, superheroines, in my experience are

likely to turn up impregnated by the darndest

assortment of trans-genetic plantamals,

extra-terrestrials, or mutant life forms. No telling

how many little mouths or suckers she'll have to feed

even if there are only one or two offspring.

Also, whereas villainesses usually have only one

kitten or sprout at a time, your typical superheroine

is so fertile, she winds up pregnant with two, three

or four every time she lets a male penis (or proboscis

or tentacle) into her treasure box to pump her full of

his semen (or seed or ichor). From the looks of your

girlfriend at just four months, I think you should

consider yourself lucky; this one (Wonder why the

Woman seems so familiar?) looks like she could be

carrying quints.

In addition to the number and species of the babies

your lover is going to pop, weight gain, and her

ability to delegate her crime-fighting or

crime-committing tasks to others, a superheroine or

villainess also has to take into account how long she

intends to nurse her brood. I would naturally like to

have a face to face (or, better, a mouth to nipple)

interview with your girlfriend before advising, but

again, judging from the mammaries on your SO, I'd say

she's likely to be making milk by the quart for a

couple of years. Have you considered a home dairy

business as a sideline?

Perhaps a cautionary note is in order as well.

Although her semi-super offspring will no doubt be

able to handle the flow, YOU had better be careful

getting frisky while she's breastfeeding; some

superheroines have been know to "leak" with the force

of a firehose. At the least you may want to consider

waterproof sheets and goggles before you get on the

business end of one of those jobbies. You may also

have to modify her costume to allow for a pull-down

nursing top. Of course around the house she can just

go topless, but you will want to take her out in

public frequently to show her off nursing, especially

in a few years when there are several older ones in

tow and another one in the cooker.

Finally, and most important, how soon after this first

blessed event do you expect to have her 'in a family
way' again (or for the first time if someone --how

long has she been seeing this Dr. Luthor? -- or

someTHING slipped one in ahead of you)? Here let me

offer some advice: ASAP. If those superpowers are

worth anything, her pussy should have snapped back

into shape and be ready to fuck by the time you bring

her back from the hospital. Give her a sperm-filled

welcome home that ensures she doesn't have another

period. Your girlfriend looks sexy enough for at

least twenty or thirty years of regular baby making,

so go for it!

I know that these superheroine types often harbor

desires to continue their careers whereas you, as a

normal, healthy male, would like to keep her barefoot,

pregnant, and chained to the stove. I suggest you

compromise. Keep her pregnant and chained to the

stove alright, but jolly her along by letting her

continue to wear her sexy, if increasingly

over-stretched, costume with those kinky high heels.

(Don't you love the way that Lycra stretches over her

plumped-up form?)

In my experience, after the first six or eight babies,

even superheroines get too busy taking them to nursery

school, check-ups at the pediatrician, morning

kindergarten, soccer practice, and ballet lessons

while cooking, cleaning house, and keeping you fucked

silly, to THINK about crime fighting. There is a

danger, however, that being so busy with child care

may put a dent in even her super-powered libido, as

happens unfortunately with mortal women. For these

cases you should resort to your supply of Kryptonite,

or the magic lasso, or whatever her secret weakness

is, to reassert your right to preg her again if she

gets ideas.

I hope this helps, John.

Sincerely,

Dr. Homer Vargas

Comments, please, to vargas111@yahoo.com

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Thanks

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http://www.storiesonline.net (Thanks Lazeez)

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