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The Little Match Boy gay lit

The Little Match boy by; Chris A. (omicrontheta)



 “The temperature will be in the negative degrees today as yet another

cold front moves in.  Expect blizzard like conditions in the later part of

the day into evening.  Estimated snow fall, one to two feet.”  The weather

report didn’t look good.  What am I going to do, It has been hell already,

wee, actually quite the opposite.  It has been cold, and now…even colder. 

How could I have gotten into this situation, I really don’t remember.  It

was not that long ago.  What only, four years.  I’ve dealt with it, sucks,

but I dealt with it.  But sometimes, I still cannot believe that my family
kicked me out.  For a stupid reason too.  Just cus I’m gay, I mean what’s

the big deal with that.  Realistically, what kinda parents kick out their

own child at 17.  My dad could have gone to jail, but I didn’t care then, I

was too distraught.  Current day, I was wondering the streets of New York,

my shoes are nearly gone, and I wear nothing but tossed rags.  Maybe that

is an exaggeration.  But still a traumatic situation.  You may have no idea

what it is like on the streets.  The spaces for shelters fill up quick.  It

is like the law of nature.  The strong survive, the weak perish.  Only I

just won’t perish.  What does that say, I am strong?  Hell no, I am weak. 

Small and weak.  I wouldn’t give to have a family that loves me, someone

that loves me personally, romantically.  Hell, food would be nice.  But I

eat. --  How do I get my food?  What a mystery for a gay guy.  I know, I

feel so bad, used, but what could I do.  I survive.  I need to survive. 

Tonight was no different than any other.  Other than the fact that it was

Christmas Eve.  A season, that passes with only a brisk throught from me. 

I mean, what do I deserve.  Much more than I get, but what could I do about

it.  So I hung around the hood.  At least that’s what I called it.  It was

actually a nice section of town.  There were a few apartments down the

street and businesses down the other side.  All in all a comfortable spot

to be, other than the fact that there were about five of us hanging around

the corners.  I knew the bunch.  Brandon, Kyle, Jacob, and Austin.  Then

there was me, not the youngest, but certainly the one who looks it.  Maybe

that is why I eat the best of all of us, I’ve also seen the most business. 

This comes with a price.  I haven’t been to a doctor in years, but I know

the verdict.  I have something.  Have to.  Sure enough the regulars stared

down the street.  I knew that this night I would get business.  I stepped

out onto the street and held my hand out.  Our signal.  Only the car didn’t

stop it kept going.  In the nick of time I dived out of the way, only to

realize that I lost my shoes in the process. I looked at the remnants of

them as they were run over by the car.  There was nothing left.  I had no

shoes.  My concentration shifted and I noticed my feet, numb.  I called it

a night.  Without shoes, I needed to find a place to stay that was at least

a little dry.  So I started down the street. “Where you goin’,”  I heard

Brandon say.  “You need to eat, don’t you?” “No, I ain’t doin’ this on

Christmas Eve.” “Have it your way.”  He started to hold out his hand, our

signal. So, towards the apartments I went.  It was unintentional, but I

started to look into the window.  There I saw the most depressing thing

that I have ever seen.  Happiness.  I saw, a fat turkey, gravy, potatoes,

and a family.  A father, mother, brother, and sister.  It was cool to see

people so happy.  Then I looked down and saw my own shoeless feet.  I

wasn’t in that house, with the turkey, and other food. I continued down

the street.  A car pulled up to the curb.  “Hey, boy, you available,” a man
said as he motioned toward his crotch area.  Suddenly a bright light shone

in the back seet.  There someone sat in clean clothes.  White and she

looked at me slowly shook her head.  “Well?”  The man persisted. “No.”  He

drove off in a flurry.  The lady was gone.  I continued down the street and

saw in another window something that took my breath away.  Two guys, cute

guys were having dinner together.  To the untrained eye, you wouldn’t

suspect.  But I saw, on the table, behind the food one of them had his hand

over the other. I sighed. “Hey, you there!!”  I heard from behind me. I

looked up at the heavens where inches of snow fell.  ‘Please, why me.’ 

“No!!!  I am not available.” “FAG!”  And I heard him drive off.  I turned

to look and saw that same white flash dull in the back seat of a speeding

car.  ‘What the hell.  What the hell.  Bright people in backseats of

pervert’s cars.  Shaking their head no at me.  What the hell.  What are

they, angels?’  I turned into an ally intending to find a place to sleep,

albeit, it isn’t the most comfortable place, it was shelter from the wind. 

I closed my eyes.  There I saw it.  Before my eyelids.  It was the

‘angel.’  I opened them again, yet, he, a he now, was still there. “Who

are you?” I asked. “Your angel.” “Mine?” “Yes, I am your guardian angel.”

I looked around, “How come I haven’t seen you before in my life.” “Because,

you weren’t meant to.” “So, why do I see you now.” “Because you are meant

to.  Let me take you to a place that is nice and safe.”  And the angel

scooped me up and flew off with me calmly  resting in his arms with my head

against his chest. -- The next morning, Christmas morning, Kyle found

nothing but a tattered and torn pair of shoes and in the ally not far away,

the impression of someone, still fresh in the snow.



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